Category Archives: News of the Different

Caution: Transporting Children While Macking Hoes

I don’t know about you, but 20 years ago this is the guy I wanted taking me home from St. Michael the Archangel (Home of the Crusaders), a catholic school for those holier than thou.

Interlude: My fellow Crusaders, do you realize that for 8 years of our innocent live-inside-a-bubble youth we proudly wore the word “CRUSADERS” across our chest during Physical Education? I feel dirty.

As a matter of fact, I want my parents’ tuition money back, Father Paz.

Sister Carolyn, you were the best principle ever. I remember when you were my substitute teacher one year. I think it was 7th grade. It was one of the funnest days ever. You couldn’t control the students. That was the day I lost what little respect I had left for you. I love the way you used to twirl the back of your hair around while you would speak publicly to the students. It was of way of saying “I feel so insecure right now”. You were nice and soft spoken, though. I appreciate that.

Sister Mary Gil, keep your hands to yourself. If you were to try that now, you’d get your a*s handed to you. Kids nowadays don’t play. You think you got authority cause you’re an adult? Try again. Mary (can I call you that?), I always wondered who your barber was? He would hook you up with the illest flattops, square sideburns and all. I was so jealous.

Parents, the gentleman driving this Chevrolet Express not only assures your child’s safe return from school, he offers a lesson that can only be rivaled by the after school program held every afternoon on the southeast corner of SR 441 and Miami Gardens Drive.

Your children don’t want the oh-so-boring Maranatas, Franmars, and Carlos & Susanas of the world. Give ’em what they want. Give ’em the guy who uses caution when transporting children while macking hoes.

Photo Credit: Manuel “Manolete” Vidal

Adrian Salgado is a Realtor Associate in Miami, FL and can be reached at 305-491-7179 or SalgadoA@gmail.com.

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News of the Different – Easy, Rider

When Peter Fonda and Dennis Hopper created Wyatt and Billy in 1969, they never thought they’d have so much influence over American counterculture. Nearly 40 years later, their influence remains undimmed.

I’m not sure if these two were on their way out of Woodlawn Memorial Cemetery fresh from an LSD binge on their way to Mardi Gras or if they were keeping it local and heading to Calle Ocho. Nevertheless, can anyone explain the Barbie doll posse hanging on for dear life?

Should we ask to check the gas tank?

I can’t quite put my finger on this one.

This photograph was taken by one of our loyal readers. It was shot near the Central Business District on the street that serves as the baseline that divides all the streets on the Miami-Dade County grid plan from north and south. Thanks for sharing, Jorge. You are a true public servant…wink,wink.

Adrian Salgado is a Realtor Associate with RED I Realty in Miami, FL and can be reached at 305-491-7179 or SalgadoA@gmail.com.

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News of the Different

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These photographs were brought to you by one of our loyal readers.

At first glance, you may think “what kind of a crazy b*tch walks around with a pet sheep”? That was my initial thought. However, after letting it marinate in my mind for a minute, I changed my mind. This lady is actually making a rather bold social statement:

Sheep in Miami.

Brilliant!

Why didn’t I think of that one?

Adrian Salgado is a Realtor Associate with RED I Realty in Miami, FL and can be reached at 305-491-7179 or SalgadoA@gmail.com

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