As if it weren’t painful enough to pour gas these days.
I stopped at the Sunoco gas station located at 200 SW 57 Ave this morning to experience rape at the pump once again. I usually leave my windows open so that I can, at the very least, enjoy some music while I’m being violated. However, this morning Ben Gibbard‘s voice on Death Cab For Cutie‘s Plans was no match for the voice of a white female in her mid-30’s who I hope to bring home for dinner one day.
I noticed her 5/6- year old son pumping gas into her car (as she lounged in the driver’s seat with the driver’s side door open) in the pump next to mine and thought to myself “que hombresito”.
His mother disagreed.
As I concentrate on the numbers on my pump, watching them escalate into the $30’s and $40’s (by this time blood stains can be seen on the floor directly beneath me) , I am startled by the loud shrill of the boy’s mother’s voice:
“C*jones m*ric*n, porque siempre tienes que tocar lo que no debes de estar tocando. Rep*nga! Eres un m*ric*n!” (word for word – no lie).
The curious boy apparently lowered the lever and stopped the pump before the tank was full, giving her good reason to unleash a barrage of niceties at her beloved son. The boy didn’t seem to mind. He cracked a smile and jumped into the back seat of his mom’s car. Just another day in the __________ household.
I took his name down and gave him my business card. Twenty years from now he’ll either be un rial estay, un morgish broquer or un aprayso.
Never too early to establish a professional relationship.
Adrian Salgado is a Realtor Associate at RED I Realty in Miami, FL and can be reached at 305-491-7179 or SalgadoA@gmail.com